Drawbacks of Superiority
by AwkwardedOut
Summary: Xanxus discovers that sometimes, being superior to everyone else has its drawbacks.


Disclaimer: I do not own Katekyo Hitman Reborn.

**Drawbacks of Superiority:**

One minute into the battle between the guardians of Mist and Xanxus was already sorely regretting showing up for the match. By all definitions, this was a piss-poor excuse for a fight.

When that piece of trash Mammon had requested permission to unleash the Arcobaleno's full powers in the fight, Xanxus had thought it would make for some decent entertainment. After all, what was not to be enjoyed about seeing the scum that claimed to be Vongola get maimed and killed?

Unfortunately, he had not accounted for the fact that his high level of perception rendered him impervious to illusions. It meant that he saw nothing of the fantasies that were apparently being thrown about like confetti by the two so-called _combatants_. Meanwhile, the scum that surrounded him _oohed_ and _ahhed_ every other fucking second. The dumbasses were too damn happy about being so weak-minded as to fall for these stupid hallucinations.

The gleeful chuckles and gasps of surprise coming from his officers were getting on his nerves. They acted as if there was an actual fight taking place, when in reality, all Mammon and the girl were doing was standing around in the otherwise empty court. To him, they appeared to be engaging in a staring contest to determine the victor.

Xanxus scowled. _Fucking illusionists._

If it wasn't for the fact that Mammon had proven himself useful by reducing targets to blathering, drooling idiots on missions, Xanxus would have had the baby executed already. But Mammon's credibility didn't solve Xanxus' more immediate problem of being unable to see a single damned thing.

He knew that if one could see illusory images, it was typically due to one of two reasons: one, the person had the mental capacity of an ant; two, the person allowed himself to view them in order to counter them. His subordinates were obviously of the former category, and the illusionists themselves supposedly belonged to the latter. But Xanxus was physically incapable of lowering himself to the level of inferior trash, even if the result could potentially alleviate his boredom. As far as he was concerned, seeing illusions in order to counter them was just an excuse for dumbasses that didn't have the mental capacity to block them.

Xanxus thought he saw the girl's finger twitch on her trident. For a moment, he got his hopes up that maybe the weapon wasn't just for decoration, that there would finally be some action in the room. When nothing remotely interesting occurred, he once again cursed this entire fiasco.

It wasn't that he actually gave a damn about the battle—not even an iota. But the fact that he was so exceedingly superior to the scum that surrounded him made him the only one in the entire freaking room who couldn't enjoy the show, which made this match boring as hell. And he couldn't even do anything about it, since the Cervello bitches had locked him inside this stupid cage. Who the hell did they think they were? He'd have killed them already if another two weren't simply going to pop up to take their place, and another two after that, and another… And he just couldn't be bothered with that much work.

For a second, he felt a sliver of disappointment at Squalo's absence. If only the loudmouth hadn't gotten his ass handed to him the previous night and then subsequently gotten eaten by an oversized fish, Xanxus would at least have something to shoot at to abate his boredom. As it was, he could only sit back and wait for this battle—_what a joke_—to end. And if that scumbag Mammon valued his life, it had better end soon. Even Arcobaleno were susceptible to bullets in the head.

In the court, the girl suddenly rushed at Mammon, her trident relentlessly stabbing the air in pursuit of the Arcobaleno. Mammon dodged the strikes, moving further back to avoid the sharp tines of the weapon. She cut the air, summoning multiple snakes that fell upon the baby.

_Final-fucking-ly,_ Xanxus thought, as he watched the reptiles materialize in midair, their scaled bodies constricting around the baby. It appeared that the opposing scum was capable of more than just mind games and twirling her little stick around. He was so happy—relatively speaking—to finally be able to see _something_ that he gave a small grunt of appreciation at the magic trick, even though _he_ would have never succumbed to such a feeble technique. The fact that Mammon was having so much trouble with it just went to show that his subordinates were all a bunch of incompetent weaklings.

The girl went in for the final strike, but was blown back by a blast Mammon released to escape his bonds. After a long and pointless monologue by the baby—why did these scumbags insist on explaining crap he didn't give a shit about?—the girl appeared to throw herself backwards, crashing into the hardwood floor.

Xanxus raised an eyebrow at her reaction. Usually, he preferred to hurt _other_ people when they talked too much. Well, whatever—self-inflicted damage was just as much fun to watch as the other variety, and anything was better than watching them stand around doing nothing.

She made a grab for her weapon when it fell out of her grasp, before promptly collapsing. Judging from the exclamations around him, her stomach had begun to cave in. Xanxus couldn't see what the big deal was—it had been like that from the start.

The scum on the other side of the room began to have a fit over the new development, but Xanxus just let out a large yawn; he really couldn't make himself give a damn. He'd seen worse—he'd _inflicted_ worse, on those stupid or suicidal enough to take him on. The damage usually comprised of torn limbs and shattered skulls. So she was missing some organs—so the hell what. It wasn't like it mattered; they would all die horribly in the end. What was a few missing organs compared to the disposal he had planned?

There was a noise of discontent from beside him.

"I only got to see a little bit of the Arcobaleno's power," Belphegor complained.

_Power my ass._

Xanxus' attention was redirected across the gym. He narrowed his eyes in annoyance as the idiot on the other side began spouting nonsense in that annoying high-pitched voice of his. What Xanxus wouldn't give to shut that piece of trash up with a bullet between the eyes.

_Damn cage. Why haven't those Cervellos opened it yet?_

The sound of laughter suddenly filled the room as the girl stood back up. This time it was Mammon who threw himself backwards.

The idiots around him immediately began conjecturing about the reason for the girl's absence, and why a man had taken her place.

Xanxus didn't know what the hell they were babbling about, but assumed they had been taken in by another illusion. How a gender change could possibly make any difference in the outcome, he didn't know, but the girl had managed to stand back up, looking ready for another round. He could only groan at the implications.

_Goddamnit_, he cursed silently. This was never going to freaking end. He yearned for the simplicity of a time when one simply shot the enemy full of holes and took the spoils off the corpses, a time when shit like this wasn't necessary.

Mammon writhed and contorted in midair, whimpering in pain when Xanxus could see nothing fucking wrong with him. The girl—man—hell, she could have been a purple hippopotamus by now for all he knew—stepped forward, slashing the trident in the Arcobaleno's direction.

Xanxus rolled his eyes. _She missed._

If he didn't know better, he'd think the other illusionist purposely avoided cleaving the Arcobaleno in two for the sole purpose of dragging out the fight—or in other words, pissing him off. If that was the case, it was working.

The girl laughed, and suddenly everybody else began swaying on his feet and groaning in pain. _Weak pieces of trash._ He noticed the green tinge that colored the faces of the people closest to him, and swore if they vomited on his new boots, he'd have another pair made from their hides.

Back in the court, Mammon flew around the other illusionist's head a few times, shouting ecstatically. After he initiated yet _another _staring contest, his face suddenly took on a congested expression. "Impossible!"

At this point, the girl simply extended her hand across the gap that separated the two illusionists. She grabbed the half-ring that hung around Mammon's neck and pulled it off in one swift motion. And Mammon let her.

_What. The. Hell._

Mammon began turning on the spot, looking high and low, as if confused as to where his target was.

_She's right fucking in front of you._ Xanxus swore the piece of shit was blind.

Mammon began screaming in agony, chubby fingers clawing at his throat, tiny feet scrabbling on the floor for purchase. Then, in the blink of an eye, the Arcobaleno disappeared, and the only person remaining in the center was the girl.

The vanishing act elicited simultaneous exclamations of surprise from both sides. Judging by the rival group's shocked faces, they had just seen Mammon meet an unsightly end. But across the gym, Xanxus could see dark particles flying out of a high window. Mammon, no doubt.

When the other group's illusionist confirmed it a moment later, Xanxus ordered Gola Mosca to eliminate the baby after the conflict. Damn brat not only wasted his time, but dared to lose the match on top of that. Mammon should count himself lucky he was getting off with such an easy death.

It wasn't the end he had expected, but currently, all he cared about was getting back to the hotel for a midnight meal of steak washed down with copious amounts of alcohol. And he would most likely need to relieve the accumulated boredom by taking it out on whoever was nearby. Eyeing his two remaining officers, he tried to decide which one would make the better target.


End file.
